The Tuesday Theory

As far as days of the week go, in my opinion, Tuesday’s are the worst. Large or small, far and away the worst. And without further prompting, here is why: (If you’re younger and need to, substitute work for school here)

  1. Monday’s are the start of the week, we dread them, fear them, loathe them, but we prepare ourselves for them. That’s the difference. They already have the expectation.
  2. Wednesday’s are the midweek, a checkpoint that lets you know you are half-way done.
  3. Thursday’s are the Eve to Friday and thus carry a sense of relief in sight. A downward coast. A finish line in the distance.
  4. Friday’s are naturally the day we like to work toward. Late nights occur without repercussion and we have an entire weekend to indulge.
  5. Saturday’s are for doing anything. An.Y. Thing.
  6. Sunday’s are for family, sports, lounging and prepping for Monday.

Then there’s Tuesday. This lump in the week is just there with no purpose, no drive, no mercy. You weren’t expecting this Monday feeling to carry into the helpless void of another day that is so far from the weekend and not even halfway there yet. All the work, all the things that need done seems to fall into this one worthless day.

And I can already hear it, “Well, what if you had a three day weekend?” Yeah, great, now Tuesday has literally taken over Monday’s place of dread and still not provided the midweek marker.

Take that same argument to your holidays that might fall on Tuesday. Who wants to work one day, have a day off then work three more days?

For anyone who watched Popeye growing up, when did Wimpy always say he’d pay someone back for a hamburger? Next Tuesday. Did he ever? …

The only thing Tuesday’s are good for are taking off with a Monday. Or maybe Ruby Tuesday’s, I love their turkey avocado burger.